June 2010
Simple things...
I miss simple,little things. Like a brief phonecall from someone special that makes you smile uncontrollably. Or simply seeing their name pop up on your phone&skipping a heartbeat.
I obsess over,analyse&compare other people’s bodies. Purely because I’m so uncomfortable with mine.
I tend to think too much this late.
I miss having someone to make an effort for, to dress up&look good for. Someone who cares what I look like, who sees something in me others don’t. I miss the anticipation of the journey and travelling to see someone special, gentle shakes&butterflies in the stomach.
But mostly I miss being spontaneous&romantic.
Lately.
I am all about big,baggy clothing. Self consciousness is coming back,and it’s nice to be able to cover up&hide behind clothes. It makes me feel small&little, &i like it.
I've realised a few things lately.
I have a growing obsession with crosses/crucifixes. I have five necklaces&a bracelet with crosses on them,&I wear them all (Not at the same time,obviously). I’m not religious, but I can respect the connotations&message behind the symbol. They are my own personal reminder of my faith in my family&friends,&the strength&support they provide.
I recently claimed one of...
Is this really too much to ask for?
I’m a simple lad, I’ve never been spoilt or been a brat or whiny. But there’s something I REALLY want right now. I just want a girl. Someone I can drink and smoke with, be comfortable and talk with. I want someone to wrestle with, someone to fight, let off steam and make up with. I want someone to watch trashy TV and films with, someone to read to. Someone to share good...
One day.
I want to make music. With my best friends. Just because we can. I want to see how all our different tastes&backgrounds&personalities would manifest itself in a musical context.
